Nursing Comes to and End

March 14, 2009

When I decided to breastfeed Liam before he was born I always told myself that I would not be one of those crazy people that obsessed about making it work.  I soon found out that you needed to be mildly obsessive to make it work because it was not easy.  Those first couple of weeks were definitely a struggle for both of us but once we got past that we seemed to get into a groove that worked.  

I survived by setting short term goals.  My first goal was 6 weeks, then 3 months, and so on. Every time I was desperate to quit I would tell myself that if in one week I still felt the same way then I would quit (thanks Lindsey for that advice!), but things always worked out and I kept on nursing.  Also please don't think that because I was the one breastfeeding that other people did not play a vital role in my success.  Mike was such a huge support.   So many times I would cry to him that I could not do it anymore and he would give me a pep talk about the women in Africa and that if they could do it so could I.  I also strongly depended on Miriam from Brookwood lactation.  Miriam was a friend of mine from the NIUC who gave me unwavering support even after I moved North.  That poor girl received many phone calls of desperation!  Looking back now it was a road with many ups and downs that are hard to explain but definitely worth it!  

And now one year and three weeks after Liam's birth I have decided that it is time for us to give up nursing.  Part of me wants to rejoice in happiness...freedom!  I can now eat, drink, and be merry when I want.  I can sleep in on the occasional day and hand off breakfast duty to Mike!  I can wear a regular bra that has support for those droopy boobs!  But part of me is so sad...I look back at all those quiet times we had together and know that things will be different. 

I was worried about how Liam would react...I have been slowly weaning him so that we were down to just the morning feeding,  would he even notice?  Oh did he notice!  I stopped the morning of our flight to Florida because we got up so early and it just seemed like a good time. Liam started randomly biting me throughout the week.  He would bite me through my clothes, that was a real struggle.  He also started pulling on the necks of my shirts trying to get in there...kind of embarrassing in public.  Oh and watch out if he saw the girls while I was changing...he would start flapping his arms and squealing in delight.  But now about one week out he has stopped doing all of the above and seems to be fine. 

Looking back it was definitely worth the struggles to nurse him for over a year.  It is nice to have some of my freedom back, I think the best thing is the bra...ahh some support again! Every time I start to miss nursing him I just start thinking about baby number two!